I'm doing laundry so I'll have clean clothes to wear for the holiday. And of course I put a new load in the washer and totally forgot to push start. I remembered the soap, and setting it. Just didn't actually start it. FAIL.

I am now the proud renter of an apartment in Cotati. I'm super excited. I move on the ninth (OMG only like, 2 weeks to pack! Eep!) but since I'm just moving out of my dad's then I can take my time about getting all my stuff. I signed up for Comcast today and why the fuck does cable and the internets cost so fucking much? Anyway. Yay! Merry Christmas to me.

And now I have 5 whole days off of work.

Fuck you Mattel. Everyone else might already know this, but they are totally discontinuing the American Girl doll Samantha. To make room for a modern one. Great. So instead of a cool historical doll with awesome outfits and stuff, there's going to be yet another doll in slutty clothes? Yeah, that's cool for little girls. Now I'm feeling all nostalgic and wondering what I did with my American Girl dolls. Crap. I hope I didn't get rid of them. Grrrrrr.

Between this, and the 12-year old girl who was accosted outside of her home by unidentified plainclothes detectives and accused of being a prostitute and then had assault charges filed against her and her father because they fought against her being carted off by total strangers, I'm not in a very good mood. Deep breath. That was kind of a really long sentence.

Hit Bush in the face with a shoe. Best game ever? Possibly so.

And, I found out that we're going to be closed all day on Christmas Eve and the day after, so now I have a 5 day weekend. Whoo-hoo! I don't get paid for it, because I haven't accrued enough vacation time yet, but so what? Plus, if New Years is just as slow, I'll get another 5 day weekend that week. Awesome.

Everyone should go here. Hysterical.


And the most disturbing news of the day award goes to - Drew Peterson. He's a former police officer from Chicago whose wife disappeared like a year ago and is a suspect in her disappearance. It was his fourth wife in fact. The first two divorced him, after multiple abuse charges and restraining orders, and his third wife died in the bathtub under suspicious circumstances. AND HE'S NEWLY ENGAGED. To some 23-year old moron, obviously. Even if you didn't think he killed anyone, who could get past all the abuse charges and restraining orders? Is this really the type of person that one MARRIES?!? Apparently so. Christ.

On a lighter note, we had a potluck today at work and it was like, the best work potluck ever. Someone made a sweet potato casserole that was maybe the best thing I've ever put in my mouth. I had waaaaaay too much food and wanted to explode.

When you see this, quote Leo McGarry:

Leo: [on the phone with the New York Times] 17 across. Yes, 17 across is wrong... You're spelling his name wrong... What's my name? My name doesn't matter. I am just an ordinary citizen who relies on the Times crossword for stimulation. And I'm telling you that I met the man twice. And I recommended a pre-emptive Exocet missile strike against his air force, so I think I know how...
C.J.: Leo!
Leo: They hang up on me every time.
C.J: That's almost hard to believe.


Man, I starting looking for quotes and there was so many that I was like, oh I love that one! And so I just picked one of the first and I'm going back now to read them all and be happy. Oh show, you were so good.

Somehow I totally missed three packages from Amazon on the porch today when I came home from work. Ooops. But let's hear it for online Christmas shopping! Now I'm....still not half-way done. Sigh.

I think I might be spending more money this year on total strangers. Seriously. I picked an ornament off a tree for a C.O.T.S. kid and spent like 100 bucks on him. And I picked like 3 1/2 people off a tree at work and am spending about the same on each person. And I donated 100 bucks to a family the OR adopted. Jesus. I've got to get some self control before I run out of money. Although next year I won't be living at home anymore *crosses fingers* (and if I am, will someone please smack me?) so I won't be able to throw money around like this. I guess it's better than buying useless shit for myself, right? Right.

Also, it's freezing here. I know there's people on my flist that live in like, actual cold places, but it's cold for here okay! It hailed today. And right now from my mid-calves up, I'm freezing. Thank god for my Uggs.

I know I shouldn't be, but I can't stop laughing at this.

This might be the cutest thing I've ever read. A little French girl has written a letter to Santa:

( Père Noël, )


Seriously. I'm dead from the cute. And the exploded ovaries.

Also, my concert last night was amazing. It's always great to hear people live and have them sound exactly the same as they do on an album. And you haven't really lived until you've heard a sixty-something year old, Scottish, folk-rock singer covering 'Oops, I Did It Again'. It was hysterical. Sadly, it brought me to the conclusion that I actually like Britney Spears songs, as long as someone else is singing them. Which I guess doesn't mean too much, since I'm pretty sure she doesn't write her songs. So that's something. But still.

Everyone should read this about people getting into a fucking brawls at Chuck E. Cheese - The 'E' stands for eviserate. Seriously? I find this hysterical. Although I'm never going to a children's birthday party again, just in case something like this happens.



Being bored doesn't usually make me spammy, but I'm in a good mood today.

You know what's fun? Buying tickets for something and then totally forgetting all about it. And then remembering like, just the day before. Which means that I'm going to see Richard Thompson tonight. Nice.

Sometimes work is so very slow. It makes me laugh that I get paid so much for doing so little, but it also makes me a little sad. And bored. So can anyone send me some time wasting stuff on the internets? That you don't need sound for since I don't have speakers on my computer? On the plus side, in my (nothing but) free time, I get to find stuff like this:



OMG, what could be cuter than a baby panda? Check out the rest.

So I was reading an article over at Newsweek re:gay marriage and the bible/religion. It's basically a really long version of President Bartlet's speech from 'The West Wing'. You know, along the line of how Leviticus has all kinds of outdated rules and they don't fit into modern society. That sort of thing. I've heard it a million times since then, but it's still a valid point. I just kind of wish people would get it already, so we can hear something else.

Anyhoo, that's totally not the point of this post. While reading that article, I can across this sentence - "...and by the 1970s most states had gotten rid of their "head and master" laws, which gave husbands the right to decide where a family would live and whether a wife would be able to take a job." MOST states?!? MOST?!? I'm terrified at the implication that there were states that kept that as a law. Also at the implication that there are possibly still states that have that law. At least, that is the impression I was left with after reading that.

And on a lighter note, I totally have a new TV boyfriend. It's Taub, in case you were wondering.

Oh, Best Week Ever. You do amuse.

Last night was the Christmas party for my last job. It was kind of awkward seeing some people again, but pretty much everyone was like, hey when are you coming back? It's nice to be missed. The party was a ton of fun, as always. I'm proud to say that I did not get as trashed as last year and there was no throwing up. Well played me. And I took my camera and actually remembered to take pictures.




I'm the one on the left, fyi.


Also, pizza delivery is pretty much the best thing ever.

Shamelessly stolen from iulieki

Put your MP3 player on shuffle, and write down the first line of the first twenty songs. Post the poem that results. The first line of the twenty-first is the title.

I'm undecided about you again

I've been thinking it over
I'm walking, yes indeed
I've got no questions for you
The how I can't recall
In the still of the night
I was sitting there in a comfortable chair
Crickets are chirpin', the water is high
This is why I always wonder
It's been a long time
They paved paradise, put up a parking lot
There is a wailing girl at your feet
I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together
Use your head silly
Gimme fuel, gimme fire, gimme that which I desire
You're a part time lover and a full time friend
He whatcha know
Darling, give me your absence tonight
Deaf, dumb and blind boy
Since you're gone
Oh, the wayward wind

Ummm...okay. Metallica and The Beatles kinda threw that off a bit.

Also, quote from tonight's episode of 'House':
Fat floats in water. What else floats in water? A duck.

I will love that show forever no matter what happens just because of that awesome Monty Python reference. Srlsy. Plus, Taub is my new favorite.

I'm going trolling for icons now because I haven't done that in forever.

When I was a kid I had 2 American Girl dolls. Remember those? I had Samantha and Felicity, in case you were wondering. And my sister had three (I think). And they had all kinds of clothes and accessories that you could get. Sadly, I was never the recipient of the coveted bedroom sets or anything that was, at the time, really excessive. But it's nothing compared to what they have now. My cousin just turned 10 and guess what my mom got her for her birthday? An American Girl wheelchair for her doll. That's right. A doll wheelchair. I can't even....for when your doll has a tragic paralyzing accident? I don't know. It's hysterical. They also have casts, but she already has those. And she was so excited when she opened it she ran to get her doll to try it out. Then we made her get the casts so it would look like her doll really did have a tragic accident. ( I took pictures )

I know I haven't posted in a while, but I just have to say that I could not be happier right now. Really fucking ecstatic. I might even be a little choked up.

Once again I have totally failed with the whole updating thing. Ooops.
However, I did run across this old ad today while surfing the internets at work (free time is fun). It's the most amusing/horrifying thing I think I'll see all week:

( You want me to douche with what? )

Also I saw Etta James in concert this weekend. She was very all over the place with the rambling (which totally reminded me of when I saw Nina Simone) and it the songs were just so-so. But she was vulgar and it was awesome. Lots of rubbing and gestures and foul language. Could not have been more hysterical.

I'm totally lagging on the updates, aren't I? Whatever, it's still really hot here and I'm using that as my excuse. Thank god I work in an OR and they keep it at like, 64 degrees. Which is nice, but then you walk outside and are hit with a wall of heat that's like, 40 degrees warmer than what you've just been in. Slightly disconcerting to say the least.

Anywhoo. Lets be more chipper. I totally had an action movie fest over the long weekend. I watched Tremors, Big Trouble in Little China, Terminator, Terminator 2 and Raiders of the Lost Ark. And then I realized that I totally forgot to go see the new Indiana Jones when it was in theaters (I saw Iron Man instead. Twice.). And I know it wasn't supposed to be any good, but still. It's Indiana Jones. I'm so my father's daughter.

Nothing else is really going on with me. I've discovered Last.fm and Pandora and I'm totally digging the whole hearing new music thing. OH. I did download Google's new browser, and I kind of really like it. It's taking a bit to get used to, but it's awesome. I still have Firefox though, since Chrome doesn't really have any add-ons yet. But when it does it will be teh awesome I think.

Also, since I have pretty much nothing but free time at work, I've been reading a lot of Slate these days, and staying all on top of the election and shit. This might be the most informed I've ever been (and it's still not that informed, but whatever). And I'm absolutely terrified that McCain will win because people don't go below the surface and will just take things at face value and then we'll be stuck with four more years of a Republican White House. Sigh. I actually have a huge rant, but I don't feel much like typing it out. Everyone else has already said it and said it better than I could, so why bother?

I think I had a little too much fun with links in this entry. Whoops.

Reba McEntire and the dad from Family Ties as the gun-enthusiast survivalists in 'Tremors' will never not crack me up.